"The Beard Grows, But The Head Does Not Grow Wiser."
"Lawyers work hard and, like us, they're human, many of them."-Dick Cavett
“A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.” - H. L. Mencken
"I tell you, I'll consult my lawyer. And if he advises me to do it, I'll get a new lawyer."-Groucho Marx 
"We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can."
*The first in a series of posts about a distressing trend in business generally, and the "legal game" specifically.
I am "on" LinkedIn, but I really have very little idea about how it works.
I am a lawyer of pretty extensive experience, and some accomplishment. I consider myself rather self-effacing, having much to be self-effacing about.
While cruising around the LinkedIn site, I have learned:
- Everyone (excluding me) is a genius;
- No attorney on LinkedIn (excluding me) has ever lost a trial/motion/status conference;
- LinkedIn attorneys (excluding me) are constantly showered with myriad awards and honors; though,
- The threshold of achievement does not appear terribly high.(An association I belong to posted an effusive thank you to someone who had served on the golf outing committee. The picture accompanying the post was so large clicking on it actually made it smaller);
- Notwithstanding items 1,2 and 3, modesty seems to reign supreme on LinkedIn: Members constantly post about their honors bestowed, stating how humbled they are by their proclaimed achievements. I tend to agree with the author Terry Pratchett, who wrote “Modesty is only arrogance by stealth.”
One of my recent favorites involves a recent trial victory in Wayne County. Now, I still think a jury trial win is a pretty big deal. Though, truth be told, very often it is the "if" and not the "how much" cases that get tried. In the present case, a team of 2 defense attorneys obtained a "No Cause" on a premises liability case involving a fall at a casino.
I have litigated premises liability cases from both sides of the "v", many to verdict. And there is no doubt that Michigan premises liability law has been pretty defense-friendly for 25 years. Many plaintiff lawyers don't even take these cases any more. But, some will still take a flyer.
So, while getting a verdict is still getting a verdict (you can quote me on that), a premises No Cause is not exactly winning Marbury v Madison.
Therefore, I winced a bit looking at the graphic(shown below) included with the LinkedIn announcement: What a win!
Yike. By the way, that's a raised fist in front of the rising sun, not the Loch Ness monster looking for an early morning nosh.
Get some perspective. You did not steal the secret of fire from the gods and give it to mortal man. You beat a guy who lost at your crap table and was now tossing the dice with your jury (a theme that featured prominently in opening and closing, I'm sure).
That picture did remind me of something. Took a while and then it hit me. See below.
A win is nice, for sure. But act like you've been there before.
LinkedIn award and victory proclamations have become about as meaningful as Facebook posts showing what the page owner made for dinner.
When everyone always "wins", and everyone is "honored" all the time, what is really special any more?
As the great W. S. Gilbert once wrote, "When everybody's somebody, then no one's anybody."
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