LEX FUGIT

APHORISMS FOR AGING ATTORNEYS 3-EXTENDED EDITION

"(Insert name of client here) is a wonderful witness, is  extremely sympathetic, makes a great appearance, and will make a great impression on a (insert name of county)jury."--Last sentence of the introductory paragraph of plaintiff's Case Evaluation summary.

As a plaintiff PI attorney for 20+ years, I used that sentence as a matter of course.

Until the time I represented a career felon in a combined auto neg/PIP case.  This gentleman had been in prison 20 of the 21 years before the accident, and in fact, he had been released only 12 days before the accident happened.  Hey, anyone can get in an accident.  

Adding a little spice to this case was the fact that by the time I was assigned the case (it was already in court), our hero had been back in prison for 9 months.  He was violated on his parole based on a complaint filed by his girlfriend that he had physically attacked her.  Our client was claiming that this same girlfriend be paid (through this lawsuit), by the PIP carrier for Attendant Care and Replacement Services rendered to him.

And the cherry on the sundae--even though this guy had not had a paying job in 22 years, some company extended him a litigation funding loan before he went back in "the pen".

As he hadn't had much of an opportunity to treat much either, his case did not present at all well to a Case Evaluation panel, or later to a judge at the Serious Impairment Summary Disposition motion.

Being the enterprising attorney that I am, I did argue:

He could no longer walk as far as he could before the accident.  (He liked to walk at least a half mile daily, but the prison walls were only a quarter mile from his cell).

His activities were restricted based on written directives from licensed professionals.  (Officials of the Michigan Department of Corrections).

He required assistive devices in order to safely make his way about his "home".  (A shiv/shank).

He would make a fine appearance in Court. (Maybe I said "frequent appearance" in court.  He certainly he had sufficient experience).

Justice was done in that case.  We did not appeal.

 

 

 

THE NEW LOGO

Soon to be incorporated into watermarks, company annual reports, business cards, coffee mugs, backpacks, TV ads, radio ads, newsletters, stationery, LinkedIn posts, email signature blocks, pens, jar openers, YouTube videos, billboards, newspaper ads, golf outing hole sponsorships, blimps, banners over college football games---the self-promotional mind boggles.  I have it:  THE LEXFUGIT.COM BOWL.

By the way, the firm motto:  "Barba crescit, caput nescit" (a real historic Latin proverb) means:  "The beard grows, but the head does not grow wiser."  

LEX FUGIT-WAYNE COUNTY CASE EVALUATION PANEL AUGUST 14, 2019

One of the things I like about sitting as a neutral case evaluator in Wayne County, is that you see a lot of members of the Guild  Many attorneys, even after retirement from their full time jobs, continue to sit as case evaluators.  In fact, one day back in the Spring of 2019, I was sitting on one of 4 panels, each of which had a former AAA staff counsel serving as defense evaluator:  Charlie Pfeffer (on my panel), Chuck Trickey, Dennis Killeen, and Tim O'Neill.  

In addition, you do catch up on current events.  Unfortunately, not all current news is good news.  On August 14, 2019, I learned of the most recent, but apparently final retirement of Sarah Horace, the MTA hearings clerk.  Sarah was the Mediation Tribunal to most litigants and evaluators.  

I remember back when I was a plaintiff lawyer at a high volume firm, I was at Case Eval a lot.  After checking in, I would kind of "wander" back to the hearing rooms, only to hear Sarah call out:  "I see you goin' back there, Butler!  Don't you be goin' back there, Butler!"   She thought I was trying to "jump the queue", ahead of other litigants.  She was right.

Sarah retired once before and was called back to put the Tribunal back in order.

Apparently Sarah said her goodbyes at the August 9 2019 MTA golf outing, just the week before I sat.  I did not attend the outing.  I was preparing for trial at the time, and I don't golf.  Plaintiff PI lawyers generally don't schmooze their clients on the golf course.  I have tried to golf, but I was not good at it. Whenever I teed off the little church doors would close before my ball got up the ramp.

This time the retirement is official, I hear.  Sarah has family out of state and will be moving to be near them.  Although the new hearings clerk is extremely nice, the Tribunal won't be the same without Sarah.

If that was not bad enough, during the day I learned of the sudden death of Mike Daniels, a retired attorney from the firm of Romain, Donoforio, Kuck and Eggerer.  The firm's office was on the same floor in the same building and in space now part of the Mike Morse Law Firm.  

We used to refer to Daniels' firm as "Romain, Cobb, Bibb, and Iceberg-Lettuce serve you".

Mike was one of the good guys.  A great advocate, Mike knew his files and his law, and he didn't take the practice too seriously. 

When he retired a few years back, we got a letter or email, just saying he was retiring.  Period.  No second career as mediator, and I don't know that he even came back to be a case evaluator.  

His death was sudden.  I don't know the circumstances well enough to say anything else.  He was here, we worked together for decades and now he is gone.  Very bad news.  Rest in Peace, my friend.

Finally, I heard a rumor of some sort legislative assault on either case evaluation generally, or the Wayne County Tribunal in particular, coming from the western and/or northern parts of the state. 

While case evaluation is not perfect, I don't think it needs to be either eliminated or fundamentally changed.  I have offered to help address these issues.  

I hope we don't lose the Mediation Tribunal, especially after I have finally qualified as a neutral.  I understand that neutrals are in such short supply that they continue to get appointed up to 2 years after they pass.

AAA-APHORISMS OF AGING ATTORNEYS PART2

This category started with installment 1, which can be found here.

Today's quotes:

"Close enough for government work".--my former Bernstein & Bernstein co-worker, Mark Grayell, describing work product.  He probably did not originate this phrase.

"Butler, this isn't a f-ing Federal case"--my first boss, the late  John R. Carney, when, as an inexperienced lawyer, I came to him for guidance.  Carney was a memorable "character" in a business filled with them.  By the way, John always filled in the spaces between the "f" and the "ing".

"Judge, I think you would benefit from a little history on this case".--The opening sentence of every losing attorney who employed it at any motion hearing I have ever attended.

SELF PROMOTION-MY PERSONAL SIGNATURE BLOCK

    I have noted the email signature blocks as well as the websites of many attorneys are plastered with the icons of various entities: "Super Lawyer", "Best Lawyer", "Top Lawyer", "Lawyer of Distinction", to name but a few. I have been afforded the opportunity to acquire many for myself. 

    These designations are bestowed, in large part, by private, for profit companies, that make money solely by recognizing the achievements of other people.  And charging them yearly for the honors bestowed.  One advertises that you can be bestowed its most popular honor for $775-per year.  Now, that is some honor.  I flatter me.

    I read an article where one enterprising fellow submitted a nomination for his dog.  His dog, named Zippy DeShickeen, is not a licensed lawyer, but her nomination was accepted, and she received an email on how to complete her app-and pay.

    I decided to get the self-promotional benefits of impressive graphics and titles with no expense, but generating the signature block, shown below, which I have been using on work emails for over a year now:

    The 4 emblems/logos are full of stars, eagles and crossed keys.  They also indicate that I am a Life Member, Officer, Commission Chairman and Board Member of the depicted organizations. And those organizations are:

The Radio Orphan Annie Secret Society;

The Buck Rogers Space Scouts;

The Dick Tracy Secret Service Patrol (wherein I am also the Inspector General);

and The Junior G Men. 

All of the emblems are taken from comic strips, radio shows or movie serials from the 1930s and 40s. The cost at that time was probably the cost of sending a couple of Ovaltine labels.

    Very impressive looking and it gives me the illusion of credibility as well "eptitude" (the opposite of ineptitude).

    When I open my spam quarantine at work tomorrow, I am quite sure I will find yet another opportunity to promote myself by buying a designation as:

Exquisite Lawyer;

Terrific Lawyer; or

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Lawyer.

    

ARBITRATION PANEL WITH JIM HEWSON-INHERIT THE WIND

    Several years ago, during my 20+ years as a plaintiff personal injury attorney, I sat on an arbitration panel with Jim Hewson, of Hewson & VanHellemont, currently the largest employer in Oak Park, MI.  I was the plaintiff's arbitrator, and Jim was the defense arbitrator.  Funny, I don't remember who the neutral was, nor do I remember the names of the lawyers representing the litigants.  I do recall that the case was highly contested and there were issues involving medical, insurance and governmental liens.  The defense carrier sent Jim's firm a lot of work, so I was expecting a real battle.

    How to get an edge or break the tension I anticipated at the hearing.

    One of my personal pet projects is the collection of historical items from Detroit area Catholic schools.  I am administer of the Facebook group, "I Went to Catholic School in Metro Detroit", currently closing in on 10,000 members.  I have a couple hundred Catholic high school yearbooks in my basement.  It so happened that one of those books was the 1970 Juggler, from Harper Woods Notre  Dame High School.  It also happened that in that book are several pictures of Jim Hewson , class of 1970,  portraying Henry Drummond (a character based on Clarence Darrow), in the play Inherit the Wind. The play, based on the 1925 Scopes Monkey trial, was made into a movie in 1960, starring Spencer Tracy as Drummond, and for the 10 years after the movie's release,, the Tracy Drummond was the defining interpretation of the role.  After 1970, however, it is generally agreed that the Hewson Drummond is the standard against which all subsequent portrayals are judged.

    On the date of the arbitration, I took the yearbook with me to the hearing, and as we got started, I said, "Mr. Hewson, I have always been a big fan.  I was hoping you might autograph your picture for me."  Taken a bit by surprise, and not really knowing what to do, he looked at the book and his picture, and signed it for me then and there.  And, here it is:

    How could we all not be friends after that?  I am not saying this alone swung the balance, but the panel worked very hard for about 3 hours, on some very complex issues, and rendered a result that I think was very fair to both parties.

    If you want to see an amateur portrayal of the role, watch Tracy's Drummond examine Frederic March's Matthew Harrison Brady (a character based on William Jennings Bryan, Darrow's opponent in the Scopes trial).  I am informed that my favorite exchange, beginning at about 5:30 of the cllip:

Matthew Harrison Brady:
"I do not think about things I do not think about."

Henry Drummond:
"Do you ever think about things that you do think about?"

are actual quotes from Bryan and Darrow at the trial.

 

 

 

  I had my own Scopes trial experience.  Around 2007, some genius in Wayne County decided that they could save some money tuning off the air conditioning entirely at the end of every business day.  The system had been on a computer program that cut the system back, but not off, during non-business hours.  The strain of the system starting from a complete stop every day finally took its toll, and the system broke down in mid-July.  A replacement  would take a couple of weeks to arrive and to install

    I had a week long trial in front of Judge Bob Colombo during that period. To reduce the heat and for the comfort of everyone,  Judge Colombo shut off the overhead lights, and let the jurors come in shorts.  Even better, he let the attorneys try the case in their shirt sleeves.  Sadly, I had passed my "suspenders" period.  Plenty of hand fans were used during the trial.  The less said about the trial's result, the better.  Let's just say, I could have used both Spencer Tracy and Jim Hewson for that one.

 

LAWYER CARTOON OF THE WEEK-9

ESTABLISHING THE "LEX FUGIT" BRAND-THE TEMPORARY LOGO

   

    I am working to establish the Lex Fugit brand.  Every brand needs a logo, so as to mark various "swag", like business cards coffee mugs, polo shirts, backpacks, TV spots and this very website.   While I have a real artist work on a real logo, I put this temporary piece together using a $3 app on my iPad Pro.  I do like this, though the lettering is a little off (as am I).

    The dinosaur fossil is an appropriate image for an old lawyer, and while "Lex Fugit" is a made up Latin phrase, "Barba crescit caput nescit" is a real Latin phrase, and will remain the official motto of this site. 

    Barba crescit caput nescit--"beard grows, head doesn't grow wiser".  Quite apt, I think.

LINKEDIN SELF PROMOTION 1-beta

(Remove watermark and photoshop my head on this guy)

 (This article is not yet ready for publication-ed)

    I am comparatively new to LinkedIn, and I have yet to post my first article. While cruising the site, I note that self-promotion is a very common theme. People love to recognize and congratulate themselves for what one would really need to stretch to call “achievements”.

    For instance:

“So proud to have been nominated as a 'Lawyer of Distinction'”.

    Translation: I ignored the weekly emails in my spam folder from “LOD” asking me to nominate myself for so long, that they decided to save me the trouble, and nominated me themselves.  An achievement that will only cost me $775 per year to maintain.

    As to achievements, winning/defeating a Summary Disposition motion is nice, but is it worthy of a “Victory Dance” on LinkedIn/Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/Tinder(Oops, best forget that last one-maybe).

    Back when I was a plaintiff PI lawyer, I had a streak of 15 months during which I didn’t lose a single Summary Disposition motion. Or, should I say in proper self-promoting fashion, I "won" every single SD motion I argued.  And believe me, in those days when premises liability cases still were filed, and Serious Impairment motions on auto neg cases were common, there were a lot of SD motions.

    Granted, the streak came at a time before social media  ruled our professional and personal lives. But, there was always The Detroit Legal News, Michigan Lawyers Weekly and the State Bar of Michigan Journal. I never contacted them about the streak. Heck, I didn’t even tell my wife about my “achievement”.

    Really, the only reason I remember the streak was that it was “bookended” by losses to the late Floyd Virant, a great attorney, and a better man. For many years, Floyd and I sat together on the Finance Committee at St. Michael’s parish in Livonia. As we shot the breeze during one such meeting, it did occur to me that Floyd’s victories had marked the beginning and end of “the streak”. As far as I know, Floyd never notified the Michigan Association of Trial Defense Counsel.

    The streak was memorable in one way. My string of results did get around the office. One day, another attorney in the firm said he had to answer an SD motion. Given my my obvious “gifts” in that area, he asked if he could look at my briefs. That was awkward.

    I know social media demands current content. And I really don’t want to wait until the hearing on my next Motion for Security for Costs (3 weeks) or my next Summary Disposition hearing (4 weeks). So, I think I’ll try this recent triumph:

VICTORY IN WAYNE COUNTY

    So proud to have had my unopposed Motion to Extend Scheduling Order granted by Wayne County Circuit Court Judge David Allen today.

    Because I was first to check in, I was put first on the Judge’s call, which was an added honor, and saved the carrier money.

    I had asked for this combination anti-trust, construction death, product liability case, involving several Chinese shell corporations to be moved to Track 3. Judge Allen hand crafted a special order for me, which on inspection, seems more like Track 1.6, but a win is a win. My Motion was so airtight that my opponent didn’t even show up! Here I am proudly holding the Order along with Judge Allen and members of his great staff.

(Insert pic of  me holding Order and Judge Allen with his around my shoulder giving me a Trumpian "thumbs up")

#LovintheLaw#Lovinmyjob#ButlerWinsBig#GoTigers#LetsGoRedWings

#ButlerWinsRealBig#DoAGoodTurnDaily#LSMFT#WhatARush

LAWYER CARTOON OF THE WEEK 8-BACK FROM HIATUS